copy pasters

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Movie Posters Cliche

Building a face out of other objects

Someone just got photomosaic software, and now none of us get to know what the movie is actually about. Congratulations on the new software though.

Running in the street, at a tilt, and tinted blue

Where did all these tilted alleyways bathed in blue light come from, and why do white men have to keep running down them holding a gun? I guess we'll just have to watch this fascinating thriller to find out.

This action movie isn't black and white, but most of the poster will be.

Perhaps trying to differentiate themselves from the average Stephen Seagal movie poster, the black and white poster says noir without having to actually, you know, understand what noir was. The splash of color (orange or red) will ensure we know there's fire and explosions and also that this isn't some boring, boobless black and white art film.

Movies about nature have one acceptable color scheme

"The poster must be blue. The lettering must be white, probably all capitals. Try to jam an oversized moon in there. Hippies like that crap" -- every poster designer for nature movies, apparently

The eyes have it

Often in the horror genre and always a movie trying to bill itself as more deep and artistic than it really is. Yes, I'm looking at you, Avatar

Back to back, viewed from the side

This is the movie poster equivalent of the morning radio show hosted by a coed team of unfunny, bland dolts affectedly laughing at the stale, "safe" jokes they bought off prepburger.

A loner viewed from behind, accompanied only by their weapon of choice

The person is always alone, and, if they're wearing a hat, there's a deadly weapon taking a prominent place in the movie and the poster. Intended to imbue the person with mystery and power, it also implies that they may be our defender as we stand behind them and let them do their thing. More likely, though, we're in for a movie with an improbably skilled or lucky hero who isn't governed by the same laws of physics as the rest of us. The poster may end up eliciting more emotion from you than the movie itself. Except for The Dark Knight. That movie was the bomb.

A silhouette in front of the ocean

Are you getting how poignant their movie is? Would another big floating head above the ocean convince you? Get ready for a sappy drama. Someone's going to die, and the director is going to try their hardest to force you to cry

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